How do I know when I'm a "grownup"??

In college, my roommates and I would discuss this issue (I'm looking at you Rebec and Sunny!). While I don't quite remember our whole list of what being "grown up" entailed, I seem to remember it involved having a job, married, kids, or owing a house. So in theory one could be considered a grownup if they had a house and a job. Or, if you didn't have a house or a job, you could still be a grownup if you had a husband and/or kids. Even though I've had a husband, a house (does it count if I HATED the house??), and a job for a few years now, I still don't feel quite grownup at times.

In an effort to remedy this, this year I've been trying to do more "grown up" things - have an decorated apartment (still a work in progress - I have ideas, but lack motivation), real furniture (TV! Couch! KITCHEN TABLE!!!), holiday decorations (love my pink Christmas tree), and celebrating holidays with celebrations of food. Yesterday for Easter, I made my first ham, and we had friends over for dinner. It was a really awesome, and a lot of fun to know I was cooking for a purpose.

Maybe I'm starting to grow up after all :)

Neurotic?

Yes, maybe a little. Ok, a lot. I am terrified of spiders. COMPLETELY freaked out by them. I don't, as a rule, like bugs or anything too creepy, but my fear of spiders is getting out of control. This morning, while drying off from my shower, I started to have these horrible thoughts that maybe a spider had ended up in my towel and I'm now squishing it in my hair. I *briefly* thought about waking up my sweet hubby to check for me, but since he was working late last night and it was too early for him to get up, I tried to tell myself that these thoughts were just crazy and I should get on with my morning. Took awhile, but I managed to do that.

This morning's episode is probably the result of a bad spider encounter I had last week - when there actually was a spider in my bathroom. ICK! I've been pretty lucky - in our new apartment, I've probably only seen one other spider (I know there have been some I didn't see!!). Which is a welcome change from our last apartment where I saw a few more than that (being on the first floor and all) and an even more welcome change from our house in NY were I saw spiders all the time (and big ones too!!). Early in our marriage, Josh learned that if I'm screaming like there is an intruder in the house, come quickly (VERY quickly) and kill it. I don't like being this helpless, but I am paralyzed by fear. If you have suggestions, please share - except if you recommend exposure therapy or any solution that involves me actually looking at spiders, no way will I do that!